For the most part, sexual dysfunction in young men is all in the head (brain)

Written by Daniel Bitonti

“I don’t think thinking about baseball is a good approach to premature ejaculation. It might get a guy two seconds longer on a given night but it ultimately makes the problem worse in the long run.” Dr John Aquino, on premature ejaculation.

If you’re a sexually active young man, the situation might not be that unfamiliar: you’re with your partner, you’re both feeling frisky, Boyz II Men is playing in the background. Then, when your partner is ready for you, you just can’t get it up.

And you can only blame it on the booze so many times.

Then, of course, there are the times when you’ve become the very unpopular two-minute man. 

“I was just so turned on by you – I couldn’t last,” you tell your partner, panting heavily as you fall back into the pillow.

If you’re basing your understanding of sexual dysfunction off of television ads, issues like ED (Erectile Dysfunction) only affect wealthy men with a bit of distinguished grey.

In reality, it’s a lot different.

“It could be intermittent, but it is very common, whether we are talking about erectile dysfunction or concerns about premature ejaculation,” said Dr. John Aquino, a physician who specializes in men’s health.

In 2006, Dr. Najah S. Musacchio, a fellow at Children’s Memorial Hospital in Chicago, discovered that 13 per cent of college-aged men surveyed for a study reported suffering from ED; 25 per cent said they could only hold on to the erection till the point of putting on the condom. The young men in the survey who described a history of sexual dysfunction also said they didn’t discuss this problem with their health care providers.

But Dr. Aquino has numerous young clients frequenting his clinic, saying he believes that younger men are now more willing to deal with the problem than in years gone by.

 “Today, I’ve already seen two guys in that age group,” he said. “I think it’s pretty evenly split in the guys I see. Premature ejaculation is something I think they can put up with or ignore, but with ED, they can’t really [ignore it]. A lot of times, it’s both [issues] together.”

Part of Dr. Aquino’s job is to rule out any physical issues in patients and then work on the associated psychological issues.

Recent research suggests that ED is a vascular disease. If a man has a vascular dysfunction, it’s going to show up in his penis long before it shows up in his heart. The penis is one of the only places in a man’s body that shows men a vascular function.

But ED in young males is still – most often – a psychological matter. Aquino says that regardless of how it starts, sexual dysfunction always ends up being partly psychological.

“Just having the problem one time sets you up for a psychological issue, so it makes the problem worse,” he said. “Most of the time, it is more of an anxiety condition, but that’s not to minimize it…that’s a huge thing. Your mind is one of the most important sex organs you have. So, if that gets out of whack, that’s a big deal.”

The results can be a romantic nightmare. There is denial, when a man starts convincing himself that he isn’t into sex, instead of confronting his problem. Aquino says that younger men just shy away all together. They stop socializing and don’t talk to women, because they are afraid of what it could lead to.

“Guys start avoiding relationships altogether, and that’s pretty tragic in a way,” Aquino said. 

Aquino suggested that even young men should take the approach of, ‘what is good for your heart, is good for your penis,’ so regular exercise and a balanced diet are key tools in tackling sexual dysfunction. He suggests keeping the stresses in your life under control and to get enough rest. For ED, he also isn’t opposed to prescribing drugs for young men.

“Often, what people need is a few good experiences under their belt, and then they are off to the races. I get them to relax, but I don’t hesitate if they are game to start something like Cialis to get them going,” he said. “What they need is a dose of confidence.”

In terms of premature ejaculation, Dr. Aquino says men should approach sex in a way that will lead them to a better awareness about how sensitive and how stimulated they are.

“I don’t think thinking about baseball is a good approach to premature ejaculation,” Dr. Aquino said, referencing the many suggested Internet home remedies. “It might get a guy two seconds longer on a given night, but it ultimately makes the problem worse in the long run.

“The issue is not being very good at knowing how stimulated you are in relation to where your orgasm is…your threshold,” he continued. “We’re trying to keep you below the point [Point of no return]. What we want you to do is pay attention to your body to learn the relationship between where you are and where that line is.” 

For both ED and premature ejaculation, another general piece of advice is to stay relaxed, as anxiety is simply counterproductive. Early communication with a partner is important, because it removes some of the pressure that men place on themselves. Lastly, Dr. Aquino says to not ignore the problem. The faster you take care of it, the less likely it will spiral out of control.

Your anonymous comment may be printed in The Ontarion's print publication.