How to humanely capture and release a spider

How to humanely capture and release a spider

The path to a wintry hell is paved with good intentions 

Spiders are a necessary part of house cleaning. They get rid of bugs so you don’t have to. But sometimes spiders can be icky. Here’s how to quickly and humanely remove a spider from your home.

Step 1: Locate the spider.

Step 2: Place a cup over it.

Step 3: Slide a thick piece of paper under the cup.

Step 4: With the spider trapped in between the paper and the cup, bring it outside and safely let the spider down in the grass.

And that’s how you capture and release a spider!

Update on the spider removal

I awoke at 1:30 a.m. Tiny red bites speckled my face. I felt something lightly scuttle down my cheek. As I looked over, I caught a glimpse of the spider I had brought outside earlier rush underneath my dresser. The shadow cast by the moonlight quickly concealed his yellow and black striped body and meaty legs. I scrambled to move the furniture, but the weight of the hardwood made it impossible to do by myself.

I attempted to rush to the bathroom to tend to my bites, but the door wouldn’t open. The handle seemed to be glued down from the other side. I can’t escape my room.

Update two

I’ve been trapped in my room for four days. The door refuses to budge. The trinkets and lamp on my dresser seem to be moving and falling onto the floor by themselves. Every time I look, they inch their way closer to the edge until they plunge. I can see the spider dart away from its final position on the dresser right before the impact. I could try and catch him, but I’m too weak.

I think the spider also turned off the heater. The temperature in my room almost matches the winter weather outside. I attempted to call for help, but while my phone charged the first night, something chewed through the cable and stopped the process. I tried using my landline, but that cord was also cut.

Update three

It’s been six days and I’m still a prisoner in my own room. The heat isn’t on and the window keeps opening by itself. Just a sliver at a time, but enough to let the winter air in. I close it, but that doesn’t make it stay down.

I can still see the spider I tried to bring outside. He darts around the ceiling and across the window from time to time. I’m too weak to try to do anything about it. I can’t help but think he’s doing all of this — that maybe I’m just a fly trapped in his web. I should have killed that spider. Instead, I put him outside to slowly freeze to death and now he’s doing the same to me.

Graphic by Alora Griffiths/The Ontarion

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