A single’s guide to surviving Valentine’s Day

A single’s guide to surviving Valentine’s Day


It’s just another day of the year, friends

We all see it coming. From the shelves upon shelves of red and pink chocolates and kitschy gifts, to the hundreds of emails pouring in from retailers announcing Valentine’s Day sales. If you’re in a relationship, it’s likely that these kinds of things don’t really bother you, but to those of us who are single, it can feel like getting repeatedly slapped in the face by an angry pink goblin. It’s tempting to put on a brave face and laugh it off, but why suffer when you can kick that goblin right in his smug little face?

EMBRACE THE SINGLENESS

WikiHow suggests “loving yourself,” and “celebrating your singleness,” but I think that laughing at all the other people spending way too much money on gifts is way more rewarding than focusing on yourself. Take some time to look at your bank balance. Even if you only have 12 dollars to your name, at least you know that that 12 dollars is yours, and you will get to spend it on discounted Valentine’s Day chocolate.

SPEND SOME QUALITY TIME WITH YOUR FRIENDS

If you’re bummed about being single, there’s nothing better for the soul than spending some uncomplicated quality time with your friends, either one on one or en masse. Make sure they’re single too though, cause if they’re not, it could be awkward.

PRACTICE BEING ALONE

In the movie How to Be Single, the newly alone protagonist passes on some good advice: take this opportunity to practice being alone. You aren’t bogged down by a relationship, so take this time for you! Go for a walk, read your favourite book, grab that slice of cake you’ve been eyeing, or make a giant ice cream sundae. There’s no one around to judge.

EAT YOUR FEELINGS

Order a pizza, buy a bottle of whatever you prefer, maybe some chocolate, and put on a movie. Revel in the fact that you have a whole pizza all to yourself.

BORROW A DOG

If you have a friend with a dog, capitalize on that. Dogs will love you, even when no one else will, and if that friend is stuck going to a Valentine’s Day dinner, offer to pet sit for them and get some quality cuddling time in. Eating your feelings also becomes significantly less depressing if you have a dog to pet.

SEND YOURSELF MAIL

Everyone likes getting stuff in the mail, and Thought Catalog suggests you send yourself a card. It’s fun, fairly cheap, and you can feel like someone cares about you. Remember not to put your return address on the envelope though, or the postal worker will judge you.

Get Tinder. Again.

You know you want to.

Photo by Karen K. Tran/The Ontarion

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